Doing what you are good at is not enough to make you happy * Danielle Krekels

How can we navigate midlife in a positive way? By doing it together. We can all learn from each other in this phase of transition. Everyone has similar doubts and dilemmas in their third quarter. In this series, we talk to inspiring Third Quarter lovers on how they navigate it. Today we talk to Danielle Krekels (heading to level 64, but feels like 45 psychologiclay)

Let me introduce you to Danielle Krekels

Danielle is an energetic, inquisitive entrepreneur, author and thrill seeker, who keeps fit as a scuba diver since her 55th. She told me she is trying to become wiser and milder, definitely willing to even more support younger women. One thing that's unlikely to change? Her impatience.

Being an expert in the search and selection of Masters and PhDs in Engineering Science between 1987 and 2018, she made this discovery in psychology about the link between your favourite childhood activities, toys and games, and your adult ‘coretalents’.

It became her greatest mission in life: helping people knowing their core talents in order to make choices they are still happy with in 25 years. Jo and I just analysed our core talents a few months ago. No real surprise, but really happy to fully realize we have been using what we are naturally good at it in both our careers. Creativity, social organisation, sociability, taking initiative, show and entertainment are some of my core talents. I use them in keynotes, workshops and community building. For Jo, it's more about strategic insights, problem solving, empathy, structure and tactics. No wonder he's been a CEO since he was 30.

The results of our third quarter selfscan have shown that many people in midlife are looking for new adventures and experiences. What about you?

Most people believe that doing what you are good at is enough to make you happy, but that is not true. A lot of people feel exhausted at the end of the day, because what they do is in fact built on acquired competences and not backed by their strong coretalents. That's true at 30 and also at 60.

My advice is very simple.

Choose things that fit with your complete self. You don’t have to go cave diving or bungee jumping if you don’t dispose of a strong coretalent for taking physical risks. Yes, it is out of your comfort zone, but no: it doesn’t exactly make you happy - beside getting out alive .

What do you like about growing older?

Self knowledge.

Be sure to know exactly what fits to your character, your potential and your intrinsic motivation: your coretalents. Your strong coretalents (everyone has about 11 of those) make you happy, do thrive you with purpose and give you energy. The small ones suck energy…

My idea about fulfilling your life, is living your own purpose to feel better both physical and psychological.

Knowing your precise personal combination of strong, half and small ones (boxes nor types involved, your profile is one out of 94 billon possibilities) gives you the certainty to make choices you’re still happy with over 25 years, as prof. dr. Dick Swaab, worldwide renowned neuroscientist, phrased it in my latest book about core talent differences between men and women.

As an entrepreneur, Danielle clearly uses her core talents of structure, risk taking, breaking rules, flexibility and empathy... and has done so for a long time.

Maybe you are in midlife and still wondering what your core talents are? Well, it's never too late to find out.

One simple question to get started: what did you love doing most as a child, before you were 12? Chances are those are the things that come natural to you.

Danielle, what are you most looking forward to in your third quarter?

I am looking forward to having a better balance between pressure and calm, since this remains a topic. Listening more to my poor body I abused so many years...

The hobbies I want to continue are spending quality time with my grandson of 4 whom I try influencing as much as I can to become a scubadiver, so we can go diving together as from his 10. By then, I will be at level 70 and I hope he will be so kind to wear my heavy air tanks .

Continu attending operas, reading and spending quality time with my friends also remain essential for my quality of life.

And oh yes: I will state all my wishes for ICE (in case of emergency): no reanimation for me! If complete recovery is doubtful (which it almost always is) I want to be left alone and pass the threshold - nothing in between for me. And I definitely want to be cremated.

Being an atheist, I only want to live on in the minds of the people who knew me and find it

worthwhile, all the rest doesn’t matter.

“People who matter don’t mind, and people who mind, don’t matter”

It's one of my favourite quotes. And still, in reality I still mind to much about others...